


Dirty Wings

by snarkingturtle



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: 3x03 spoilers, Gen, It just happened, not even really sure what this is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-15
Updated: 2013-10-15
Packaged: 2017-12-29 11:36:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1004970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snarkingturtle/pseuds/snarkingturtle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Regina doesn’t believe magic has any place in love, and she stopped believing in fairies when she was ten, after Cora cracked three ribs in the name of motherhood and no one came to help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dirty Wings

**Author's Note:**

> flash piece attempting to get in Regina's head during the fuckery of "Quite a Common Fairy."

* * *

 

Telling Tinkerbell she fell isn’t entirely a lie, but saying she jumped wouldn’t have been entirely a lie either. To be honest, Regina isn’t completely sure what happened, only that there was despair, and anger, and plummeting, and that now she’s sitting with someone who is actually listening to her, and, well, it’s all a bit dizzying.

 

Regina doesn’t believe magic has any place in love, and she stopped believing in fairies when she was ten, after Cora cracked three ribs in the name of motherhood and no one came to help. But Tinkerbell smiles at her, and seems so nice, and Regina thinks this is the first time someone has seemed genuinely interested in her—her, Regina, not _wife_ , or _stepmother_ , or _queen_ —since Daniel died. So maybe Regina doesn’t believe in the sweet promises that fall from Tink’s lips. But she does believe—wants to believe—in the warmth of someone offering friendship.

 

At the very least, she thinks, it will be an adventure, a night outside the cold confines of the castle. A night of talking, maybe even laughing, and oh, Regina misses laughing.

 

So she lets Tinkerbell sprinkle her with fairydust, tries to ignore the way it tingles under her skin and makes her brain buzz. This would be enough, she thinks, just this, flying over the countryside at night with someone holding her hand. But all too soon they are landing, and Tinkerbell is throwing around words like _happiness_ and _past_ and _no baggage_. Regina wants to tell her it’s not that easy, that the past doesn’t always stay in the past and happiness isn’t something you can take just because you want it—but before she can get the words out Tinkerbell is gone, leaving Regina alone with magic and fear.

 

Hand hesitating over the door, Regina stares in, tries to see the man Tinkerbell had found for her.

 

Instead, she sees a heart crushed to ash, and her love, still, so still on the floor, not waking up no matter how many times she kisses him.

 

She sees a footman who looks at the floor while telling her that her husband the king requests her presence in his chambers that night.

 

She sees a man three times her age pretend to ask “will you have me?” even though there is no question in his eyes.

 

She sees a torso start to turn, and her mind tumbles with _heart ash Daniel Leopold trapped suffocating body dead_ and this is wrong, this is all so wrong, and bile rises in Regina’s throat because she doesn’t _want_ this, she doesn’t want _any_ of this. She just wants _away_ , and all she can hear is blood pounding in her ears as she jerks back from the door and runs, and runs, and runs.

 

*

 

It takes Regina over an hour to walk what had been a ten-minute pixie-fueled flight, and by the time she gets back to the castle she is tired and footsore. But at least her head feels clear, and there are no longer clouds of magic clogging her throat and ears. She limps her way up to her chambers, and has a bath drawn before dismissing the servants.

 

Regina sinks back into the tub, submerging her head in the water while her hair swirls around her, and her heart throbs with _Daniel_ and _loss_.

 

She thinks about the way Daniel’s face lit up when he looked at her, the tingle that ran through her body when their lips met.

 

She thinks about the crinkle in his eyes when he smiled, that startled moment when she realized she was in love with him, and couldn’t even place when it had happened.

 

She thinks options, and choice, and freedom, and not strange green magic that wants to bind her to a stranger as surely as the ring on her finger binds her to the king.

 

*

 

Later, when she is finally in bed, Regina is not surprised when Tinkerbell comes back. But she’s also not entirely sure what to do with the fairy after the way the evening concluded.

 

Regina wants _friend_ , and _understanding_ , but what she gets is _selfish_ , and _denial_ , and _wrong_.

 

*

 

Regina doesn’t want _alone_ , not really, but at the end of the day, that’s what she always gets.


End file.
